And for heaven’s sake, start an investment retirement account now. Yeah, I know, “but I’m not making enough, but there’s that shiny thing in the (online) store window, but I’m never going to get old.” Just allot one take-out coffee’s worth of spare change per week. You can up the ante later. Let the miracle of compound interest do its thing.

Absolutely! Toasted, with ketchup!

Sorry, absolutely no clue—like at least 30-40 years ago.

Sleep tight. Don’t let the bedbugs bite. And if they do? Bite them back!

I hear this! Mine now tries to snuggle up by shoving his butt toward my face, and draping his tail across my mouth.

I’ve read about a variation of this and do it faithfully! Except you have to be driving under an overpass with train tracks, and there has to be a (preferably moving) train on the tracks above you. The idea is that when you press your hand to the car’s ceiling, you get to send a wish to hitch a ride on the train going by above you. The moving train takes your wish along with it, giving it quicker travels, more exposure to the world, and thus more opportunities to be fulfilled.

From my grandmother: “Essen! Essen!” (Eat! Eat!) Followed quickly by “You need to lose weight! You’re getting fat!”

You probably have food banks in your area which would be delighted to get some!